Catching up

It occurred to me this morning that I hadn't mentioned anything about my initiation as a Druid Companion. Because several people view this blog who really can't know details about it I won't go into details, but I can make a few comments.

I didn't perform the initiation immediately; mainly because I wanted a tool of a specific type that I didn't have so had to wait for it to arrive.

Once I had the tool though, I proceeded apace and had an amazing experience. This was solo of course, since there are no Adepts here, but it was amazing nonetheless...I can only imagine what an initiation done with others presiding would be like. I've never undergone one.

Establishing the Grove, purifying and cleansing it, invoking and banishing the elements, and inviting the Spirits to attend all went pretty much as it usually does...with a bit more intensity. The colored lights and such were all there, but sharper and clearer.

The Druidess who greeted me in the Grove (which was in a clearing in a coniferous forest) was tall, taller than I am and had lovely chestnut hair and coffee colored eyes. I knew here to be wise with years, but they sat lightly upon her. She had a stern visage at first, but as I answered what she asked her aspect softened. I simply went with what came to me to answer....nothing memorized or rehearsed, it was all from the heart. When I swore by Lugus and Brigantia I could feel Them nearby, noting my oath with care. I could feel the Druidess when she aided me in removing my red cord and replacing it with the blue one I wear now. When I picked up the stone energy coursed up my arm. It was an amazing thing.

The lectures afterward were thought provoking and hard-hitting, and I felt them, if you take my meaning, deep inside at an almost instinctive level. I have much work to do, but it is all good work. :)

The ritual wrapped up with me feeling full of energy, pleasure, and good will. Best initiation yet!


In other news, the problem I had has been dealt with...for the nonce. We shall see how things develop over the next month and go from there. I am hoping that this will be settled within that time and for the best results all around. I think this course is best at this juncture; if further action of different sort is seen to be necessary I shall deal with it as is appropriate.

Life is good! I am chugging ahead with various projects of a Druidly sort, I'll be at the Henge on Saturn's Day and performing an Astral ritual on Sun Day, then repairing to the hall of Carw Gwynt and Shadowfoot for after revel.

Under Shadowed Firs, along Moonlit Paths

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

Restless

I feel restless. I can't pin down a reason for it. Much of the day I've been quick-tempered; it's been a real effort to keep it under control at times.

Possibly it has something to do, in part at least, with having been denied my accustomed amount of solitude over the past several days. Perhaps not. I do find I need my solitude much more than I did. It has nothing to do with growing distant from people, no, it's something else. More like a need to listen...a lot. The problem is things keep interfering.

I still have that little difficulty to handle. I already know it is not going to be a pleasant task, even beyond having to do it at all. It doesn't help the overall situation. I'll be speaking with the individual tomorrow; I have to get it sorted by Solstice if at all possible. I don't mind confrontations, and I still hope to avoid anything that serious, despite what the indications say.

I sometimes feel like I'm swimming against the current in a river of molasses. Unpleasant mental picture that. Bleah! LOL

Much of my morning is spent in meditation and prayer...and these periods bring me much peace and serenity. In some ways I rather wish I could spend more of the day engaging in such; serving Themselves is always fun. But then, I serve Them in many different ways throughout the day, so it is just that form that is attractive.

Sun Day is Alban Arthuan for Oakstone, although at this point it is looking more like it will be washed out. Rain is all well and good. Rain in the middle of two feet of snow is something else again. Being wet is one thing, being cold another, being both absolutely sucks. So if it turns out to be too messy I'll go over on Caturday and do my observances, which will be showery though not rainy. So far. We shall watch it carefully. As a Priestess I am bound to observe these days with ritual, and I find it a pleasurable duty, weather notwithstanding.

My music coupled with meditation and prayer is a great release for me. I can express myself in ways I cannot otherwise accomplish and I *need* this sort of release and expression. I can cry without worry of discomfiting others, laugh without having to explain, and sample the joy of a note falling into the pool of absolute silence. What a delight. Balm for the spirit.

So I've begun wandering in the astral Grove again; that northern shore just calls to me so strongly . I know I ought to be in the center region doing work as usual, but I can't resist those cliffs...sitting where the winds blow, the surf roars, and the gulls cry is an experience without price. All the while the trees and birds keep me company. I sometimes wonder if I'm not becoming some sort of wild woman druid. LOL

More snow tomorrow night, 3 - 6" they say at the moment. Then rain on Sun Day. That would equal mess. LOL

Under the Shadowed Firs, along the Moonlit Path

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

Pondering

I've been thinking back a little of late, looking at things that have changed and the changes in myself. I'll be 52 this coming year, 52 going on 200 if I factor in life experience.

When I came home from overseas back in '78...I had been gone for quite some time, I met some of my old friends from school. People I had spent some good time with in more innocent times. As I sat and listened to them talk it occurred to me that I didn't really know them anymore. That's not quite correct; they didn't know me. At first I thought they had changed, but it didn't take long to realize it was myself. They still spoke of the same things, often the same people as we had before...it was..disorienting. They all knew what one another meant, inferred, and so on...and I hadn't a clue. It didn't take long to discover that I had no real common ground with them either...hadn't had since I'd left for the Marines so long before. I couldn't explain the things I'd seen, places I'd been, things I'd done....and when I tried it held no real impact for them. They had no frame of reference for it. Hearing about some things never replaces experiencing them. I tried for a time, but it soon became obvious that we were strangers now...on both sides of the line. We still liked one another, had shared memories...but the divergence was so sharp it would take a lot of time to adjust to. Time I never had.

And so they are all gone now. Oddly, that's happened to me consistently. Not a single one of my childhood friends is still around. A few are still living but long since gone from here to who knows where. The majority of them passed, via illness or accident...or just happenstance. Only two of the school buildings I attended when I was young are still schools. The others are torn down, historical sites, a school admin building, or a condominium project.

The same goes for every non-military job site I ever had; they are all out of business or closed and gone elsewhere.

Most of my military friends are now gone; there are only a single handful remaining.

It's funny how the world chews away at the past for some folks.

I have been around the world four times, to every major continent but two and one of those I want no part of. I've seen things I wish I hadn't, done the same, and yet I've also seen things I wish I could share with everyone. I have known some of the most outstanding people anyone could be privileged to know...and they were no one famous..but should have been in my mind. I have met some of the most vicious people, who were in positions of authority and never should have been. I have seen people at their best, and again at their worst. It has been an amazingly full life. I have done things others have only dreamed of, seen things only living in nightmares.

Some of these things feel like picture postcards now. Some don't. Some are very intense, others just quiet inducing. The most vibrant things start just after my accident; and interestingly this episode seems to have colored some of the past, opening up new avenues of meaning to explore.

So I'm 52 soon, going on 200. I've had a hell of a life so far. Looks like I'll have an interesting one yet. I don't mind actually; beats being bored. I have had a good life, I hope it just gets richer in the time left to me.

Under the Shadowed Firs

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

Chief Druid

Wow, twice in one day, there's a record. Or something.

Anyway; I'm Chief Druid of Oakstone, such a nifty thing. Rather like being a squad leader in some ways actually. With all the fun and games that goes with achieving a new level of skill in a chosen endeavor there are also some not so fun games. Usually they happen after things settle a bit...a sort of waiting period while the new situation is absorbed and considered.

Not this time. Unfortunately one of the less fun aspects cropped up pretty quickly and is still functioning, despite my hopes that it would all settle down if given some time. Doesn't seem like this will happen, which results in my having to walk along a path that may force me to exercise my authority as Chief Druid in a way I really really don't want to. We shall hope things do not follow this trend, diverging from this into something much better for all concerned.

I haven't a lot of time to ponder the matter; it probably has to be dealt with within the next week, two weeks tops. Not a great time of year to handle such things either. A lot of meditation this weekend to help me see clearly and find the best path for Oakstone and all concerned.

Responsibility can't be dodged; I know this well. I am the Chief Druid so it rests with me. So be it; I was never one to run from responsibility. However much I had hoped this would be a consensus driven group, it is clear that from time to time I will have to assume the absolute roll of Chief Druid in such cases. We can hope, and work to make, such times limited to the exceedingly rare file. Brigindo grant me patience.

By the sacred Forge-Fire

Cyfnos Gwynt

Forgework

I may have access to a forge at last. I will know in a week or so, and I suspect I shall be able to continue my work. I'm a journeywoman at the moment, lacking only my Masterwork to move on, and that particular project has been set for some time.

I'll so some other work first of course, just to shake off the rust a bit, but since I often practice my hammer techniques and control with blocks of clay I know I'm not badly off in this regard. I've spent a lot of time in this dry spell planning and re-planning and planning yet again for my Master project. I've practiced all the necessary steps and techniques over and over again. Does this mean I'll get it in one go? No, of course not. The sort of forging I am doing is difficult at best and it is easy to ruin a piece of work at any stage; that is what makes it worthy of use in a Master project. It's an ancient technique, unknown to most smiths save by name, and even then not many. It's labor intensive and to succeed requires great control over technique, over 'reading' the metal's heat, and so on.

This will be an excellent thing if it pans out. I believe it will. To move on in my field is a good thing; to achieve Mastersmith skills is a dream coming true. And all the education I had in this field was reading all the books on the subject I could get my hands on, learning the very basic skills from a farmer when I was small, refining my blacksmithing with classes in Beginning and Advanced Blacksmithing from the teacher who became my Master in Bladesmithing, and advice from *his* teacher who is one of the best Bladesmiths in the world and works at Massachusetts College of Arts. In effect, I was an Apprentice without ever formalizing the agreement.

I still have a lot to learn naturally; who ever stops learning? There are other methods I have heard of that I'd like to try...and there are the techniques I have learned from the Mastersmiths in the City of Smiths that I often visit; from them have I learned much that was lost. The reality of all I have learned from my Master, from his Master, from the Masters at the City will show itself, or not, in my work. I am not afraid, which is odd considering it is much like a test. The finished product will be shown at invitation only gatherings of Master smiths; if they deem it worthy I become a Master myself. *grins* I think I'll succeed actually.

The ancient Celtic peoples referred to smiths as 'Men of Art'; people who knew the mysteries of the elements themselves. A smith uses all of the elements in her workings. The forge is very much an altar to me, a sacred place under Belisama's watchful care.

I know my trade; both in the Art of the Smith and in the Art of War. And now I add the Art of the Poet to that. Interestingly, I can make the metal parts I need for my own instruments. I can even make the tools to make the parts. Now that's freedom and self sufficiency. :)

Thank Brigantia for this path I walk, and Artio for shielding me from the worst of my misfortune. Lugus for His warmth and strength, Ogmios for the burgeoning gift of verse, Cathubodua for skill at Arms, Rosmerta for the plenty I have at home, Borvo for my health, Taranis for strength and wild freedom...and Belisama Herself, for my skill with Hammer and Forge.

I am grateful beyond everyday words; and I am Their servant.

Under the Shadowed Firs and by the Forge's Fire

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

Thoughtful

I've always loved this time of year, regardless what people call it. The ideals of the season matter to me. This time of year also provokes a certain amount of deep thought and withdrawal from other people and things. I'm not sure why, but it does. I constantly wonder if I keep the season as I feel it ought to be kept, and always suspect I fall short; it's a constant thing.

This year it's a touch different, I have the Cauldron this time around; such a simple concept I wonder I never thought of it myself long since. Some folks will know what I'm referring to, for others I'm sorry to say I can't really describe it here; it's a part of my Path that falls under the 'mysteries' heading.

It has helped already, the Cauldron has. There are things for which I can use said Cauldron, oh yes. Especially this time of year. It is quite the useful tool.

I'm undergoing reassessments of my values, life, and goals. This too is common this time of year. Mostly I just shift the priorities about to accommodate life situations and changes. But some of this year's is still sloughing off parts of me I no longer need or feel are part of me. Since the accident I have slowly adapted to the changes that whole experience wrought, often grudgingly giving up the 'old me' and her ways, fighting to hang on to what and who I was. And that is neither possible nor healthy. The changes will come, whether or no one wishes them. It hurts less to simply embrace them, although that is much harder than folks might think.

I'm still me, yes. Basically. But I am not me....if that makes sense; I am still changing and shifting, although I think the most profound parts are over at this point. I could be wrong though; it happens often enough. Things I liked...I no longer care much for. Things I never thought about I now find I want to try. I seem to have some new 'gifts', or skills or what have you, and some old ones seem to have slipped away somehow. It is a very strange thing to be consciously aware of this world and the Otherworld at one and the same time....all the time. This has played a large part in my changes naturally; I don't see the world in the same way, despite using the same eyes.

I am a nicer person than I was, but I am also more withdrawn as well; I find it more difficult than before to sustain conversations with folks that I don't know very well. Even with people I do know well, I lapse into silences. I'm not so ready to interject my opinions, although I defend them just as vigorously as I ever did when need calls.

I've always been described as a catalyst; no one who gets to know me remains unchanged in some way, regardless of how large or small. I often get people to think of doing things, or going places, or trying things, or thinking differently, although most commonly once it happens I am no longer a part of what goes from that point. I wind up still outside, still causing change but not being a part of it. It's an odd thing. I have started many things over the years; all of them have in short or long terms moved on without me for one reason or another. It's a funny thing to contemplate.

I have things to do, things I was sent back here to get done. I don't know how far along those paths I have to go, I may or may not see the end results of them; it was not given to me to know. I have begun walking that pathway already. I think it will be very interesting and very illuminating in many ways and I look forward to seeing what develops for as long as I am able. I do know that I am going in the direction I was meant to, and that is a comfort when one is on borrowed time so to speak. I dream the dreams that others bring to life, which isn't too far off although nothing like as absolute as that sounds.

I have to chuckle you see; I am surrounded by truly gifted people, some of whom have not yet realized their gifts, but gifted they remain. I am not gifted as they are; my 'gifts' lie in other areas and that is as it ought to be. Many of these folk will go on to achieve excellent things, and I have seen somewhat of this I think. I shall hope to make Adept and Druid, which will suit me just fine; I am not a greedy person, neither for money, power, or place. A Hedge Druid I am at heart, and so will likely remain. :)

The coming year will be interesting from many perspectives. Putting aside the whole economic-resource situation, I can hope we'll have a home and land of our own with which I can lay the foundations for something that will live on after I have departed and been forgotten. A grand hope, aye, but I'll keep it anyway; it does no harm. I expect a year full of music for me, of exploration and illumination, and hopefully of good things for those around me.

It is a thoughtful time of year.

Under the Shadowed Oaks and along the Moonlit Path. May your days bring many blessings, and few burdens. Brightest of blessings.

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

The board is nearly set

So we have a really nifty bigot coming out here to Western Mass from Sacramento where he's been a royal pain to the gay community there for some time. Part of a church that is...well, extremely close-minded doesn't put too fine a point on it, with Russian ties, I'm sure the fact that Massachusetts has legal gay marriage has something to do with it. It isn't the first time people from outside have tried to come here to push their own agendas. This guy is opposed to divorce, any kind of abortion, and even cohabitation for pity's sake!

Well, I suspect he'll find New England a bit different from his former place; we aren't nearly as willing to be dictated to by someone from outside. He'll get supporters naturally; there are bigots all over the place, but this place will prove a bit different I suspect.

The one thing I most dislike about any kind of extreme fundamentalism is the constant song that the members don't hate, that they value freedom and diversity, but that their way is the only way. And they'll try to stuff it down everyone else's throat too, all the while crying out about how loving they are. It's hate pure and simple, no matter what you cloak it in.

And it will get worse. As things get harder closer to the edge of the plateau of industrial society, these groups, of all stripes, will really start coming out of the woodwork. If we are not careful, a new element could be added to the difficulties of resource depletion, climate change, war overseas, and hard times in general.

I'd say we should separate from the rest of the nation but given the changes in the laws that'd be tantamount to wrong thinking and hence a threat to the state; treason in a word. Sheesh! And people think our Constitution is still intact and able to protect us. What happened to being able to speak your opinion freely? What aggravates me is all these people, good hearted I'm sure, who are willing to give away some of their liberties for what they think is security. Despite what Ben Franklin said on the matter, if most of them know who he is aside from the lightning experiment and a face on a bill. John Hutchison (I'll let folk figure him out for themselves) had this same attitude of suppressing liberties, when he wrote to the English in his capacity of Massachusetts Bay Governor. And what of the old saying 'All evil needs to triumph is for good folk to do nothing.'? Paraphrased of course, but it'll do. Darkness wears many faces and cloaks.

There is no public outcry about much of anything, unfortunately. Not even the huge lies our leader has been telling of late. Ho-hum, gotta work, gotta play, no time for depression. What a world.

Fear rides the land like a great weight. Fear that has been sown and tended and is still being carefully nurtured...by the very people we're supposed to trust not to do this. But it is fear used in a specific way, not generalized, a certain sort of fear that is used as a tool. The words 'We have nothing to fear but fear itself' come to mind these days. Fear is a tough creature to beat; takes a lot of effort, and it is never a one time effort.

I am a citizen of this nation and a citizen of the Earth, I have served in my nation's military honorably. Watching all of this is exquisitely painful. I do what I can with my vote, with discussion, via all the legal and rightful means, but there's a lot of inertia. A lot of it. We can't wait until the last minute, but that's what it looks like we'll be doing. 'May you have an interesting life' someone said. I don't mind an interesting life over boring, but too much interesting is not a good thing.

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

Thoughts

A few things on my mind here.

The situation in the world is worsening in many ways; it is as if a perfect storm of converging problems is rushing towards us. To solve one seems to require solving any of the others...a sort of Catch 22 in effect. And we are dithering. Or denying. Or trying to put a bright face on it and ignore it. None of which will work.

I don't generally post warnings to people any longer; aside from being instructed not to in rather firm terms, I find it difficult to do effectively. To post the realities of various situations in a factual manner is difficult at best and when achieved turns people away because they hate to be depressed at all (not a very good survival reaction I might say). To post aspects of them with less accurate dark aspects can engender a false sense of security in readers (who prefer this, again not a good survival trait). So it is just as well I don't do it anymore really. Besides, the fact that the world only carries its current population due to fossil fuels is harsh enough for anyone, because just a touch of thought makes the specter of depletion and the resultant troubles that presents occur.

I leave it to others to do in the usual way. Although to be honest I will soon begin a different aspect of it, but it won't be obvious except to those who have open minds. I'll be doing it via story and poetic verse and more to impart certain concepts that *might* help those who think out of the box a bit. It is the best I can do really.

I've spent too much time in the harsher reality of human existence to be able to coat things with sugar, unfortunately, and of course there's the constant watch to be careful not to be too dark in assessing information. I am aware of what dark things and times do to people, even the best of people, which latter case I am definitely not an example of.

I think these storms, or I should say I fear these storms, will converge on us a lot faster than anyone expects; there's a lot of hubris in humanity when it comes to knowing about things, or thinking it does anyway. I can hope I am wrong naturally, but I never plan on hope; that way is too often disaster barely averted if at all.

So my transformation into some kind of poet (it remains to be seen what sort!) continues. I love this form of verse that I am currently studying and I really enjoy the challenge of rendering it in English, a tongue for which it was not created. Frustrating at times, yes, but enjoyable nonetheless.

I'm now composing bits of verse in my head during the day, increasingly not having to worry over the syllable count which is a nice thing. My vocabulary is increasing, my awareness of how to 'cheat' with words and when is growing as well. I'm having fun.

Soon I'll start to set these bits to music; composing my own poetic songs as it were. These early efforts are of course not polished and rather difficult at times, but I can't get any worse and that's a sure spur to continue. ;)

And finally, the woods I need for my harp are selected, the tools I have, and in good time I'll start what my Granther called the shining cap to a Bard's efforts; making my own instrument. A harp in this case, carved and inset, painted and stained to suit. It will be fascinating and challenging and I look forward to it.

Cyfnos Gwynt /|\

An extraordinary thing

To me at any rate. I have several projects under way just now, some for a game I play, some actually important to the path I walk. Mostly I work on the latter and sometimes they overlap on the former. It may turn out to be so this time.

I have a book that came out in '05, a sort of Bardic Handbook. In fact, it is titled just that: The Bardic Handbook by Kevan Manwaring with a foreword by Emma Restall Orr. It is a practical book in many ways and not just in the Bardic way. I finally began reading this book today.

I read the Preface by Kevan, the Foreword by Emma, and the Introduction by Kevan again...when something rang audibly and spiritually. Some simple words in those sections and yet, there in the introduction after the prelude of the other two, lay the ideas and explanations for this path I was on in simple terms. And as I read them and absorbed them, I heard the bell toll. Not once, but 9 times.

I am excited, exhilarated, motivated to a fare-thee-well! I have been training my ear to tone and pitch as well as learning music composition and theory. I have been learning the structures of the Welsh poetry called a cywydd and creating verses using these structures in my own language of English. I have been working up to crafting a gwersu for my Ovate project completely done in cywydd format. And I have been tinkering with tales of our time and the troubles that loom on the horizons around us. It has not been easy and has at times been incredibly frustrating, but it has never been far from my mind nor has it been boring.

In the reading of this book lay the keystone of all of my efforts and the arch that will hold them is made. Yuletide approaches, a special time for me, a time of new beginnings and endings of other things, a time of promise in the depths of the Dark Half of the year. The kernel at the center of my journey has sprouted and the path that lies before me shines with a soft luminescence reminiscent of the light of the full moon on a dusty country lane.

I look forward to this. I may hope my Ovate project is acceptable enough for me to enter the Druid studies of the OBOD. Too, I may hope my project proposal for my Adept studies in the AODA proves acceptable as well. Either way, the cywydd of Sight and a Druid's perspective of New England will, I think, prove useful regardless of whether they are fitting enough for me to continue forward.

The other task, of creating the Oakstone Grove still waits out there, but this path of mine leads to and beyond that as well. Perhaps to a sort of college of Bards or something, who knows? The future is not set and remains full of possibility. Such a college would be a wonderful thing to work on creating though.

Tonight when the moon rides the sky I set foot on the pathway proper and I shant look back, but ever ahead, following my feet and singing with delight at the journey.

The very brightest of blessings.

Under the Shadowed Firs and by the moonlit path

Cyfnos Gwynt (A good name for a harper)

Tired

I woke up tired this morning. As I have the past few. Partly because I haven't slept well. The other part...I don't know why. Possibly Veteran's Day.

Sunday Fighter Practice saw myself, Halfdan, Sigurd, and the new fellow whose name I can never remember...and his lass. All we did was go through stance and basic movement, no one armored. I couldn't due to sutures, Halfdan was hurt, and Sigurd had no one to hit. We hope to have our newest trainee armored by next weekend or the one after.

The Oakstone meeting went well; we covered a lot of ground on a variety of things, but there is still much to do. It is a lot of work, but it is worthy work. I hope I'm a worthy tool for the doing. I've been solitary for so long that a group introduction as Chief Druid is a bit of a wake-up and I find some of my group leading skills coming back to me, if a bit rusty from lack of real use and some unsuited to non-military applications. You'd think I'd have adjusted by now. *laughs*

I'm tired though, weary and not a little apprehensive about other things still running their course and things that may perhaps come in the near future; the latter being things I can only speculate on for the most part.

I think now that the Warrior will be called forth again before all is done. Not something I like to ponder but a possibility that must be looked at and handled before moving on along with the things that occupy me now. I had, have, a gift for leading in high stress situations. It just is.

I see prices for homes are falling again. If things continue as they are I wouldn't be surprised to see city property begin to rise in value compared to more rural places. We'll see.

I feel...lonely..in many ways. Part of that is the holiday. The rest I don't know; it has been with me all of my life. I have always felt as if I were standing outside looking in somehow. It is hard to explain in any coherent way. I put it down to shyness at one time, fear of rejection at another time, being so different from others later still....and now...now, I don't know. Perhaps it is due to the Summerlands experience, or perhaps it is simply imaginary. A relic of the past still bouncing about inside. Those who knew me best of all are long since gone and they cannot be replaced. I have good friends now but they do not, can not, know me as those others had done. I'm not easy to know really.

It is a funny thing; I feel part of my Orders, my groupings and so on...and yet the odd sense of separation is there, in a different way...as is the loneliness. I'm just tired I guess.

It could always be far worse; I don't really have grounds for complaint after all. :) A lot of other folk have it far worse than I do, I strive to not ever let that wander from my mind.

Had to fight off bouts of tears several times this weekend. Gee, why doesn't that surprise me? *laughs*

I've been making notes of my thoughts on Druidry vis a vis New England; not sure what I'll do with them, but between the history of the area, some of the odd features of the landscape, it's age, and the various Pagan communities and ideas here, it's beginning to resemble some sort of travelogue or something more than just notes. Maybe I'll go for another rejecting and try to make a book of it. Never hurts to try; just makes the file fatter. ;)

I'm tired. I need sleep, and I hope I can sleep tonight.

Under Shadowed Firs

Cyfnos Gwynt

Bracing myself

Here it comes. What with oil going upward, the IEA report just out, the fall of the dollar (imminent collapse?), China considering getting out of the dollar, gold spiking crazily, the banks admitting they have more paper out there than they are worth in total and having to write it off, and the credit collapse...I think the first 'step' off of Hubbert's plateau is not going to be gentle; rather, it will be a steep initial drop, probably with some recovery but not to the previous level.

I see the descent from the peak as an overall stairstep sort of movement...overlaid with some very sudden and rather 'violent' (actual and metaphorical) drops off the odd cliff along the way.

I have long since stopped trying to warn people, especially after Herself more or less told me not to bother with it. Since some recent situations I've been through, I don't really care to try anymore either. What is about to happen must happen; there is no stopping it. Time to pay our dues I think.

It will be interesting to watch and live through no doubt. One can always hope it isn't as bad as it looks; we all know fear makes things worse than they seem. Although this time it might actually be a little short on reality as we've not been here before. Not like this.

I'm a Druid, not an expert in the complex affairs of the modern world though I do watch them and try to learn about them. I'm not even an expert in the natural world although I am far and away more skilled and knowledgeable about that than the former construct. Prophecy is difficult at best; out there in the future there is endless potential for nearly any occurrence. The closer we get to the present the more potential becomes possibility and closer still, probability. That being said, it isn't like people haven't been warned or that we haven't seen it coming; we have, just the majority of us have ignored it.

So I have grain shipments coming in, along with other things. Will they all arrive? No idea. I hope so. Bracing myself for a possibly hard Winter and a coming year that looks increasingly as if it is going to be dynamic at best has been an ongoing effort. I think we can get through. Gods will it be so.

Under shadowed oaks

Cyfnos Gwynt

This n' That

So today is a more normal October day, thank goodness. :) I'm in a pretty fair mood for the most part.

We picked up some of those solar powered walkway lamps, two sorts; the low to the ground types and the sort that hangs from a lamppost. I'm testing them today to see how best to make use of them. I really like the one that hangs as I can hang it from my own iron posts and it also has an on-off switch.

Tomorrow is Samhain by the old Reckoning; the second full moon after Lughnasad. It is forcast to be rainy off and on Saturday which is the day the grove plans to meet for ritual. I am inclined to meet in the rain anyway but I thought it good to ask others what they thought. If it turns out to be a deluge we can always retire indoors to the gathering location.

The Veil is very thin; I live in both worlds at once and this year I am acutely aware of just how thing the Veil really is, much more so than I have been before. I intend some deep scrying this Samhain and I plan to ask a certain Ancestor and the Great Bear for some help in this regard. There are things I wish to know; I think I need to know them, but Themselves may think otherwise so we shall see what passes.

I have not yet decided whether to tote along my guitar or a harp; I cannot find my small harp tuning keys. They seem to be missing right along with my canvas shopping bag with the AODA symbol on it. I haven't the vaguest notion what happened to them either. At the moment I haven't been able to find replacements; the one is for my Hummingbird and those are no longer made. Unfortunately online keys don't give the size so I have no idea which to order in, drat it. I may have to engineer my own from a socket and wood handle. Or maybe just a small socket wrench although I'd really prefer not to do that.

Tomorrow is robe working on day, as is this evening. They are simple Celtic designs so easy to knock off quickly. I considered using commercial patterns but they didn't feel right. So I've improvised a bit using Celtic clothing styles.

It has been a hell of a month so far, and a hell of a year. As it comes on ending at the end of this month I look back with a sense of humility. So much has happened, much of it trying, and yet we have come through it stronger for the trials. I have accomplished some things, had to put some things aside, missed the mark on others. But we move into the coming year healthy and whole and with continued strong purpose.

Under starlit oaks

Cyfnos Gwynt

Weirdness

So here we are in late October...at 71 degrees with 84% humidity. This is so terribly wrong I don't have words for it. And people either don't care or try to ignore it. Some don't even notice, poor souls, since they are so absorbed in their work, or appear to be. I wonder.

I think....no, I know, moving Northward and Westward into the hills is the only viable bet around here. From methane bursts to warfare scenarios, this valley is going to be a problematic place in the not so distant future. In the event of the worst of all wars, it will be untenable. Chicopee and West Springfield to the South, Albany to the West...the former are at least certain targets. I hope with every fiber of my heart and spirit we can avoid this one; no one wins.

Methane is visibly bubbling out of the seabeds and swamps in former tundra; this is NOT good. Ice is melting far far faster than anyone expected even given the latest projections. Tensions over oil are growing; it went over 90 dollars a barrel yesterday. A sense of apprehension fills the land, a sense of waiting, like the calm before a storm. It is...uncomfortable.

Then I remember Herself and Himself and we prepare for whatever may come, large or small.

I do not think we can avoid violent upheaval, I no longer think this is possible. As Oakmouse commented to me, it is amazing how many of our generation have understood this and prepared for it over the years, most of us thinking we were alone. The next few weeks will see an increased gathering and storage of supplies...and tools of various sort. Everything packaged in plain form too and set aside in separate caches; some larger, some smaller. This blog and my LJ are the only places I publicly mention these things and that will remain so.

I may joining some fellow pagans, mostly Witches and Wizards, in raising power and trying to direct it in such a way it might, stress the might here, soften certain trends. I think it worth trying anyway. I'm not trying to save everyone, no. I'm trying to buy a little time or a little less pain. It was brought up at PPD by an elder I have a lot of respect for. She stressed magical people as opposed to simply pagans. We shall see how it works out.

Life is assuredly a great foundry. It is a hard road to walk, but I think the current direction is our own doing as a species...and abetted now by our arrogance. The debt is coming due.

/}\ Cyfnos Gwynt
Derwydd Cartref
Derwyn Carreg Llys
292-2007 CE

I'm an idiot

Yep, card carrying and everything. *grins* This is nothing new.

While trying to think of ways to blend a hobby and the main focus of life for me I got annoyed enough because what I do as a life path isn't really related to the hobby I play at. And then I got the idea that portraying a Gaulish or British woman, which is relatively easy and necessitates only a change in clothing, could go further. That is, I make a blue Gaulish or British style belt and hang from it a simple pouch which is the repository of things mundane and necessary and further create a shoulder/crane bag based on the roman style recovered from a wreck, and then finish the shoes which Gauls may well have worn, as well as making what was known as the Gaulish cloak...I should be good to go in both worlds. Minor things like having a belt instead of a cord and the crane bag slung from the shoulder rather than tucked into the belt don't matter much. I've even patterned up a sheath of sorts for my sickle. At this rate I'm going to have a dozen pouches and bags. Sheesh!

Since I had planned to use iron and vinegar to get the black dye for the leather, and olive oil to keep it supple and strong, the whole thing would be period to a fare thee well. Probably take me, oh, three or four days to make. The pouch is easier; buckskin cut in a circle with a lace run through the edges, alternatively a belt style pouch of the time used for slingshot. That too is documentable. The cloak is too of course. The shoes I can't complete until the hobnails get here, which should be happening not later than next month.

Natural color linen for clothing, based on the finds from burials, decoration to suit, and I should be good to go....either way; modern or ancient. I can always take pictures of the pieces and leave a note for those interested saying 'find me'. Hmmm. Natural linen, green, blue, and I can even make the leather belt wrap twice, sort of, and provide a place to hang a ceremonial bronze sword at need...and dye it blue naturally. With some gold and silver decoration. The nemyss is harder to square of course, although the Egyptians did wear something of the sort and the Gauls were there....yeah, major stretch at best. LOL So the hood on the cloak will have to do I guess, or a simple hood attached to the outer sleeveless tunic-tabard, although that last I cannot document.

Backstrap weaving for trim...IF I can get it done, or tablet weaving if I'm thinking Gaul. I have another unadorned stave I can sort out with some carving, if I have time. *nods sagely* While I have no idea what historical Druids may have worn, I figure it was pretty much the same as the other people, although it is entirely possible they used bleached linen or wool to set them apart. Shamanic types often do dress differently. All speculation of course.

In hobby I'm simply playing a part, essentially, but I can use the clothing and regalia for out of hobby real world functions too.

Not a bad compromise, now my brain is awake again. Dratted doldrums.

/|\ Cyfnos Gwnt

Random static

I'm a secessionist. That is, I think New England should separate itself from the rest of the nation. I'm a screaming minority of course. Peacefully, naturally, although that pretty much guarantees it never happens. Interestingly, California, Alaska, Hawaii, and Texas have secessionist movements. Vermont's is gaining ground too. There's even been some chatter of the seaboard provinces of Canada joining with New England. That will never happen. LOL At least I'm not alone in my thinking.

"When the citizens fear their government, tyranny rules" - Thomas Jefferson.

I'm irritated, and annoyed, and tired of the bull that keeps coming out of our supposedly elected leaders. They are supposed to serve us, not the other way around. Lot of hogs at the trough so one butt looks pretty much like any other...just some of them haven't grown as much as others. Yet.

Anyway, I'm tired of a lot of things. LOL Nothing new there. I may get rid of my LJ account too, though I'll consider it first.

I've never really fit in; the whole cog in the machine bit never appealed to me once I understood it for what it was. The lie that everyone could retire to golden years never took with me either; doesn't take a genius to figure out that there are far more people than money, especially when said money is held in a tiny fraction of the worlds population. The dream painted by the system and society never did really take well with me. Of course, that meant I'd have an interesting life, and so I have. At least it hasn't been boring.

I've been thinking about a lot of things lately. Soon I'll turn in my stuff for OBOD and see if I make Druid Grade student there and then begin on my Adept studies with AODA. Those are my paths, broadly speaking. Within them lie smaller, more wandering trackways, but part of the larger path.

I have some projects I need to finish at some point because I promised them. After that though, I'm done with it; that path is not mine to walk and to be honest, I just don't have enough care for it to motivate me. I should have remained true to myself from the first. Sometimes I'm an idiot. It isn't a matter of worthiness or ability, it's a matter of time and desire. My desires are focused on my path and the things that are associated with it so my time is caught up in those things. Trying to blend the two things only works to a very small degree thus far. We will give it a bit of time yet and see.

I want out of this damned apartment, nothing new there. LOL Hopefully not much longer. Restitution is being sorted out next month and if that comes in it enables a wider range of possibility. And of course the market is still going down. I do, however, have to be aware that soon a new harp must be ordered in; the time is nearly right.

I'm tired these days, and not sleeping well; I suspect this will last for a little while yet. I've been doing a lot of praying today and I will soon be setting up to make some more garb and ritual clothing. I do know that at Yule I'll be dressed in garb appropriate to what I am; an attempt to blend things so I don't have to entirely give up on the one for the other.

Under starlit oaks

Cyfnos Gwynt
(Duskwind)

Fish or Cut Bait

There it is. Time to fish or cut bait; one is either a Citizen of the planet, or a consumer of it. Very soon now people will have to choose which way they are going; along the same business as usual path of consumerism to the nth degree, or change their lifestyles, dramatically, and become a Citizen acting responsibly.

We will all have to choose. Some of us have begun to diverge already; it is not an easy thing to accomplish. Everything in the society we and our ancestors have built resists any deviation from the common path. Our own selfishness adds a bit of seasoning; some things we just don't *want* to give up. Doesn't matter what it is, we can justify or excuse it in a myriad number of ways. And we do. We built the society in such a way that just to live requires participation. However, that society is getting shaky; most of us may not see the cracks and stress damage, but it is there and it is spreading with increasing speed. Many of us who do see refuse to go as far as we might; denial and avoidance of depressing things are common in modern folk.

But the slap is coming, and it will be hard. The poorer folk are already feeling it. Worldwide many '3rd world' nations are in increasingly desperate straights. We'll be feeling the same here before long. Global oil production peaked two years ago. Global liquid fuels production peaked around July of last year. For nearly two weeks oil has closed out at over eighty dollars a barrel. It won't come down much anymore. Save the car society at any cost, that is the mantra.

I don't warn anyone any longer; aside from having had someone point out it wouldn't do any good, I do believe the time for folk to sit up and take notice and get moving is nearly past anyway. It will soon be too late. Better late than never, for some, but that won't hold for a lot of people. Some of them people I know and like.

I went to Harper's Retreat last month; I met some people I was meant to meet, had a grand time...and felt guilty the entire time. *shrugs* Life is a bitch sometimes.

May the Gods bless everyone according to their merit, and a good deal more besides. May They bless and keep folk safe if it be Their good will to do so.

My best under starlit oaks
/|\ Cyfnos Gwynt

Contemplations

More closely tied to the Gods I have become, without doubt. To be a Priestess of the Gods, serving the Gods, that is where much of my duty is ordered. I find it a pleasant duty. Still, there are other concerns and there are other things impacted by this development. I do not have a set temple, at least not at the moment, rather I have my home altar and of course the henge about ten miles distant.

In good time I will move from this apartment to a final home of my own, soon if I do not miss my guess. A good part of me is reluctant to leave the vicinity of the henge; I have tended it for some time now, as often as I have been able to. Moving would spur me to build my own of course, and this is in fact happening all over the world even as I write this. But it depends on location to a large degree and making some of these is not inexpensive. However, building one is a worthy endeavor, so I suppose I'll continue the hunt not only for a home but also for the right spot. Every time I go to visit a potential place I have my bloodstone pendulum with me, and my crane bag as well. I'm always getting my hands in the dirt of any place I visit, listening to the trees and animals about, searching for the rhythm of the place. Desperate attempts are being made to keep the house prices high and to keep the banks from paying for their greed. It won't work. It will, however, make obtaining a place more time consuming.

I have friends, some of them very close friends. I do not see them or talk to them very often any longer; we are widely scattered and they have their own concerns. And I am focused more on the Gods and my tasks. I play in games and belong to organizations, which are steadily losing my interest, not because they are not good or fun, but because I am changing. Most of them require some amount of travel or other expenditures, requirements I am becoming less willing to meet. I'm having an increasingly hard time justifying traveling around for a game when it is so clear that we are past the global liquid fuels production peak and well past the global oil peak. When I see the lines being drawn in the sand, hear the constant bickering and squabbling over something as illusory as money when compared to the reality of the global climate changing far, far more rapidly than our favored linear predictions allow for.

I do not think the job matters much if the world is a wasteland. And I am not so sure thinking of the great changes that are coming in terms of centuries is any wiser than expecting climate change to be predictable. I am more cynical I fear; I do not believe humanity is innately noble. More to the point, neutral is a better term with culture and society deciding which side of this we drift to. I have seen wondrous acts of selflessness, many times..but I have seen many more acts of hateful spite. It is easy to be generous and giving when one has plenty, but the true test of generosity and kindness of spirit is giving when one has very little. Unfortunately, in the world that is coming that last and best trait of generosity will be in short supply; most of those who practice it will not make it through what is coming.

A storm is coming, more like several, but all ready to hit home at nearly the same time. It is a tempest of our own making. There is no avoiding it. I can hope the coming die-off, which I expect to be in the 90% range, will be due largely to the natural mechanics of overreaching populations. But I don't really expect that; humans have learned too well the concept of "If I can't, no one can." and "I have a right to..." We have not cared for our mother the Earth. We have not given thought to the 7th generation. We have cared only for ourselves and our own gratification and we still follow that..largely. I have heard many say they don't want to know because it is too depressing. A pity life never promised anyone pleasure or happiness. Our Constitution guarantees one the right to *pursue* happiness...but it does not guarantee it. Nothing can.

We have passed the point where we can have a soft landing for the most part. Certain areas will do better than others, assuming mass migrations to those areas from harder hit areas don't do them in too. We are all going to be forced to drop our lifestyles to what most Americans see as 3rd world levels...and possibly lower. Here and there a bit of better living might make it. Maybe. But I suspect people will find they will have to lose their sovereignty and liberty to do it. We are about to be equalized, if not totally then in some very interesting ways.

It will be interesting to watch it develop. According to that test I took at the VA, that long and complex list of questions, my biological age is only 28. Despite my chronological age of 51. Supposedly I can look forward to reaching 99-100 years of age, assuming nothing unexpected happens. I don't think that will happen. But if it does I'll be walking in the Grand Archdruid's scenarios for Adam, only on the opposite coast. Or rather toddling at most. Oddly, it does not depress me at all. It just is.

I am far more interested now in preparing myself and mine for what is here. A little time remains, but only a little. My sons will have a chance, and I can't ask for more than to give them that. If I can I'll help set up a specific sort of community, though I think if it isn't set into motion very soon it won't happen until the dust settles. Communities need time to adjust and settle...and if people wait too long they don't have that time. It will be interesting to see how it goes.

And so I walk my path, writing new stories and myths, serving the Gods and preparing to serve the Tribes as best I can in the troubled times that are coming.

Peace be with you.

My best under the starlit oaks

Cyfnos Gwynt

Hmmm

I haven't visited this blog in a while. I've entered a time of quiet for the most part and so feel little urge to post. Herself has called me to this, along with others, and I have found it most illuminating thus far. I no longer take much part in sounding warnings or speculations on how things are going; She was quite pointed on where I should be on those subjects. Besides, at this point I suspect everyone who is going to heed the warnings and can see far enough ahead to take it seriously has done so. The harrowing and the winnowing will begin before long I think, sliding in like a whisper on the breeze, unnoticed and unfelt by most at first, gaining as time passes. Perhaps another year of things more or less as they are before the reality begins to show itself in terms very hard to ignore. I worry for the young and elderly this Winter, but things will be as they are meant to be.

I have been a battle leader for many lifetimes, more than I am willing to put down here. I am intimately familiar with it and its many faces. I see it when it sneaks about, looking for unwary times and people to foment itself into being. I see it coming again, searching, hunting, and the ground is fertile. But it is no longer for me to lead in battle in the ways that I have done. My guardianship of things is passing from the actively warlike defense of things and places to that of a guardian of the Old Ways and protector of Wisdom, such as it is. It is a slow passage, and the warrior lurks within me still....

I serve the Gods, and in particular three of them; Brigantia, Artio, and Lugus. Through serving them I serve the Tribes as best I may. Helping to lay the base foundation for what may come and for those who may pass through it still able to live. The mark of the She-Bear lies upon me, as do the marks of Moon and Sun. I am pleased and humbled by this.

I dream frequently, rarely nonsense dreams any longer. So much some friends have begun to refer to me as a Dreamer. I cannot argue the point. I have dreamed the She-Bear and I have dreamed the Boar...what it means I cannot now say for certain. A Banfaith, my cousin called me; an old Irish term for a Prophetess...probably closer to an Ovate of some sort. I am an Ovate...

I see pictures in the morning mist that lies over the river. I see pictures in the shivering notes of the harp as I play. I am growing.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Hidden illumination

Sometimes we find illumination in something that we know well, or think we do, or are very comfortable with in the old and familiar sense. Such it was for me this morning. I listen to a lot of music in the mornings, and stories set to music as my own path follows this road. Most of these songs are familiar to me, so familiar that I have little need to bend my mind to their recitation.

I have explored these songs many times in the past for various insights and ideas but for a goodly period hadn't found doorways I had not seen before. Until this morning.

I put on Robin Williamson's version of The Dialogue of Two Sages, a cherished favorite of mine and on piece I hope to perform myself at some point. Ideally with another person such that the Dialogue could be done between two folk. In any event, I was listening to it yet again, paying more attention to the notes and chords of the harp than the words. Somewhere in the third playing I suddenly found new doorways to pass through, new ideas and shining illumination to absorb. Sometimes we must reach a point of familiarity with something before all of the doors are visible to us...secrets hidden from those who have not achieved a certain level of comfort or wisdom. So it is with life, and yet we still find them surprising and unexpected when they are revealed, these doorways. For myself it is what keeps thing fresh and exciting in the World.

Unfortunately I suspect a lot of folk simply don't pursue such things and remain unknowing of many of the wonders out there. And I think to an extent society and culture actually encourage this lack of knowledge, this ignorance of illumination. I have taught my sons to seek for wisdom in all things, seen and unseen, known and unknown, and to persist and reexamine things from time to time, to change their perspective to gain better understanding. And my eldest tells me this is hard, and makes communication with a lot of people difficult under various circumstances. Such is the lot of the seeker of wisdom I think, especially today. He tells me he is often criticized for thinking too deeply and being overly concerned with details. It is true we can fall into this trap, for there are many traps along the pathways, but even so I think the pursuit worthy of the effort and the dangers.

Often the trouble comes when an acquaintances' cherished idea about something is challenged by such thought and introspection, for that is what this really is...introspection of a sort. Something discouraged in people these days and certainly not taught widely. Examining a thing from a variety of perspectives also reveals our own ideas and values relating to the thing under examination. In such a way is illumination found and yet it may well disturb those around us as we do not react in the way they expect. For to find illumination is to find also change, both outward and inward, and changes make many folk uncomfortable.

It is easier to see, in this light, why we often hear of 'Wise People' being shunned or reviled in various times and cultures. The wise are often agents of change, if not for people as a whole, certainly for themselves...and that in turn affects those who know them. Unfortunately it also sometimes evokes a rather unreasoning response. Just another of the dangers to the Seeker on a path that is one of the most difficult to walk.

Food for thought.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Familiar places

I'm sitting in an ornately carved chair near a fire blazing in a stone hearth. I have the knowledge that this is my seat, and only my seat and of late I have spent much time here. I have a horn, the same one my lass gave to me as an anniversary gift, cradled in my lap from which I occasionally sip mead. When I think of my lady a sense of longing passes over me. Age lies heavily on me and my hair is entirely white although I am not bowed or slouched in any way.

I have been here before, when I was younger although not terribly so. It looks like a barn built to be or converted to a meadhall of sorts. There is a goodly crowd of folk although the place is by no means full. I realize I know them all, some very well. I see a young man working at the bar that runs along the wall and I realize he is my youngest son now grown to manhood. There are many younger folk in here and I also realize, not many older folk; a few here and there. I notice some long time friends sitting in other chairs close to the hearth. It is Winter now and I feel it is close to Imbolc.

The tables and chairs are strongly made if roughly so. The sign of hand work is everywhere. Tapestries and banners, hand made of course, hang from beams and rafters. Some of them I recognize some seem very new. Around the wall are shields in various states of disrepair. As with the banners, some of the devices I know and some are strange.

Rhiannon stands close beside me, softly glowing with care and firelight. Her soundboard is well bowed with maturity and she shows the marks of being carted about. Character, some call it. I understand I recently got done playing her though I cannot recall what it was I did.

Looking around at the company the feel is peaceful and pleasant. Folk laugh and talk of everyday things; I am reminded of when I was young and listening to my Grandfather. It is the same; different people, different time, same sorts of things.

The door bangs open and amidst much stamping of feet and shouts about the draft a tall man steps in and waves at the company. He is my eldest son and full grown now. I make him somewhere in his 30s. He shakes the snow from himself and stamps it from his boots before coming over to me and offering a hug. I can see his concern as he looks me over closely; I feel the presence of both worlds so very strongly. I suspect it will soon be my time.

"You have done well, cousin. We are proud of you."

I smile at the sound of the voice: herself was with me on the longship during my journey. One of my ancestors has come to call. It is good to see her although she doesn't look any older or younger than the last time I saw her. It is no surprise; she is only visiting this material realm for a bit. I comment that I seem more tired of late, the cold bites more deeply and I tend to fall asleep a lot. I am pleased with my boys and I realize that I am indeed very happy. I also realize that I am tired, but not in the usual way. I ask her then, if it will be soon. She tells me I do not have much longer, that my lass is waiting in the Hall and I shall have a goodly rest before I must needs make the journey again.

She looks past my dream self and tells me to walk carefully and plan well, else what I am seeing may change to something else. To be careful of those who might be troublesome and thoughtful for those who need help. I assure her that I will do these things.

***

It was an interesting dream. Very intense, very short, so very full of emotion.

The path I am walking is not an easy one, and I am serving my Gods as a Priestess to Them as well as serving the Tribes through my service to Them. I also have the everyday concerns of a partner and mother who must live in the world and deal with its ups and downs. I know the thing I am set to build and to do is amongst the hardest of goals to achieve and yet I am happy to aim for it. I work in Their service, and it is pleasing to know that doing so also benefits myself and mine.

Assuming I don't do something stupid, by no means a certainty, I may have a good several years in me yet. I should hope such a scene comes to pass; I was at peace like I have never been before.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Reflections

I'm listening to 'Music of Celtic Legends; The Bard & The Warrior' by Jeff Johnson & Brian Dunning. I listen to a lot of absolutely stellar music, musicians who consciously or no manage to tap into the Great Song of Creation more closely than is usual and produce pieces of exquisite beauty and emotion. These two artists go beyond that in some of these pieces. Theirs is the only music I can think of offhand that includes synthesizers and still manages this. A lot of flute and harp, which I suspect helps, but mostly I think it is themselves; with this particular album they managed to reach more deeply into that which runs through all things; Music. They were inspired by two fantasy series built on Celtic backgrounds by one Stephen Lawhead. I've read both series and enjoyed them immensely. 'Song of Albion' is one, the 'Pendragon Cycle' is the other.

Watching my son at football practice last night and seeing the light in his eyes each time he looked our way; the delight of a child is an awesome thing, something many of us tend to lose as we get older and get bogged down in the business of living. It is something worth working to retain as we go along. I have never lost it, not for long, and even in the darkest ways of my life path it glimmered there still, waiting a chance to escape if only for a moment. I thank the Gods and my mother for this gift; I was never taught to 'grow up' in the way that causes one to lose this trait all too often. Out there playing catch with him I was myself a child once more, delighting in just being. Priceless.

Similarly, I thank my mother for not teaching me to close my eyes and mind. She never taught me not to see the things I noted in the world about me, never told me that trees can't talk, never taught me there was only one way. Blessings upon her spirit for this very great gift. I miss her greatly in these days, for many reasons. Chief among them is that my son doesn't know his grandmother; the things she could have taught him, and even me to this day. I have tried to continue her methods with my own children; they have seen faeries and not thought it was imagination. My youngest has seen one of our cats, long since crossed, coming into his room and curling up on his bed when he is fearful or sad. He can see, and I count this a good thing.

I'm trying to sort out how to make these songs and stories say what I wish them to say without being heavy handed. I noster; we would probably be a lot better off if most folk did. Somehow I want to get people to stop seeing Nature as something outside of themselves. Rather, I want them to start seeing Nature as Us. Perhaps if we did this there'd be less fear of doing stupid things in the name of energy, national pride and other such things. Perhaps not, but it is worth trying. All that 'evil' needs to succeed is for good folk to do nothing. Paraphrased of course, but still worthy.

Whether I can begin to make a mark in this regard remains to be seen. I still need to master the poetic forms and get sorted out with these musical aspects I am learning. I learn fast, but it does take time, and I haven't any experience as of yet. That will be hard won through doing.

I'm really working hard on the healthy aspect of life at the moment and doing very well. With a touch of fortune I'll be in far better shape by Yule. Most of the junk we had in the home is gone now and isn't being replaced at all. We eat healthier meals which for the moment have a goodly portion of our own produce in them. We'll soon start making our own flour for various things too even though I have to order the grain, for now anyway. We are making progress.

Revel in each lifetime, the good and the difficult; it makes us who we are and each experience is a treasure of learning. Open the mind, and encourage the minds of others to open, being mindful that each person has their own path to walk. Let calm and centered self allow harshness and difficulty dissipate around one with minimal impact. Set as good an example as is possible for others to learn from. These things, amongst others, are part of my Druidry and I am well pleased with it.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Stories, Song, Gifts

The dust is settling since the whole exam thing is done and I successfully completed it. Naturally this means stirring up a different sort of dust; new myths and songs for a troubled world and region. Among other things there are two 'gifts' I would give the greater community around me; the gift of a sanctuary with grove and circle and the gift of new myths and songs to build upon and around. I have little doubt I will succeed in the first though the second is far more difficult. Still, that one is being designed for the ears that can hear and eyes that can see with an open mind and clear thought.

Will it be any use? I can't say. Perhaps not now, perhaps never, but it will be there nonetheless; and maybe, if it isn't needed, it will be due to the fact that it was in fact there. That would be a good thing.

Ideally when I have the sanctuary built the four great celebrations will be open to all and sundry while the four cross quarter types will be less so. It is my intention that the circle and grove be usable by anyone who wishes to do so requiring only respect for the place, the people who live there, and the celebrations that will be set there. The idea is to have it an intentional community within and integrated with all the surrounding communities. Simpler living, if not so easy as current modern life. A part of the surrounding communities, not separate, fully involved in the world, not isolated, but living with a smaller footprint and more conscientious and natural rhythm.

So the search goes on and in good time, soon I think, we'll find the right spot and the pieces will fall into place. After that goes into actuality we'll see where the road takes us. Alongside this is, of course, the series of new myths and songs I'm working on. I have no idea how successful I'll be, but I'm doing it anyway; it is worth doing for its own sake.

Finally the gift of service, part of which I have already attained a better ability to render through ordination in my Order. I don't know if I'll be asked or called upon to actually render any of the services this makes me capable of giving, but if ever it is needed I have it to give, and that matters.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Next step

Well, I've done it. Feeling excited, humbled, shocked, and very very happy, I've become a Druid Companion of the AODA and a Druid Priestess as well. Yep, I chose ordination. I'll also ask for a study group charter once I've touched base with some other folks. Oakstone comes to mind; I have never forgotten the dream vision I had so many years ago now.

It's been a long road, with a LOT of study involved. I'll take a little bit to myself before preparing for Alban Efed and the first sacred grove as a Companion of the Order. Besides, I need to tablet weave my blue belt, though I've already got the stone; a lovely lapis that is reminiscent of the Earth from space.

OBOD work for a while now, aiming to sort that out by Yule at latest. Then its onward in both Orders although I am not entirely sure what I will choose to do for AODA yet. Possibly the creation of Caer Noddfa and the building of its stone circle and grove, along with other stuff.

What an amazing thing. :)

Cyfnos Gwynt

End run

Well, there it is; paperwork is fully underway and should be totally complete in a few days. Due to major distractions and family duties, I cannot work on such things when the whole family is home, most especially in an apartment where there is no refuge from interruption. As a result the work has to be done when I am home alone, actually a rare occurrence outside of the school year. It is aggravating and one of the major drawbacks to apartment living, for me at any rate.

My essay on spirituality and my own understanding of it is nearly complete anyway, as is the comparison between Asatru and Druidry as I understand it. My work on the Gauls is going to raise some eyebrows but once again its a subjective topic as set and so is my own opinion. I am fortunate to have many of the ancient writers translations to work from in this endeavor. Revival Druidry and its values and applications was simple enough. What Druidry means to me is going to be given in verse as how I present it is up to me and that one is not started yet. My understanding of the Earth and how things relate to it is also nearly done.

My own rituals, being spontaneous, are simply snapshots of what I do, with the most common elements in place as a structure. How my smithwork relates to Druidry was very easy to do, and my exploration into healing via herbal concoctions has been illuminating as well as entertaining. A couple of other things I intend to send information on are nearly complete.

All I can say for it is that after all of this I will avoid 'paperwork' based things like the plague; I don't see the need for it and it is hugely difficult for me anyway. I don't retain what I read unless I read it many many times over, *unless* it really captures my attention. If I find the material boring or onerous, no matter its value, I won't retain much of it and its a huge struggle to read it anyway. Now if the stuff were in verse or song I'd retain it without trouble. Such are my gifts and lack. When I teach these things, if I am to teach them to anyone, it will be done orally in any event as is traditional. There are many ways to be a scholar. I can understand the need for written material in distance learning such as occurs with the net and various things. But I don't have to like it or admire it. *laughs* I could wish I had the same sort of memory for retaining the written word as most people I know...but then, I wouldn't be me. And the work is appreciated all the more for being a greater hurdle.

Divination wise I can use multiple methods; runes, cards, ogham, crystal gazing, water gazing, dowsing, and what I am overwhelmingly best at; Fire gazing.

And of course I am still involved in my journeying around the landscape and finding sacred places, as well as getting to know the local Gods and spirits. That will never end in fact, until it is time for me to leave this worlds-realm and cross the Veil.

Finally, the path that has opened before me and that I now walk with combined trepidation and elation is only just beginning; the end, if there is one, will be many more lifetimes away yet I ween. And of all I have done with Druidry before and now, or will do in the remaining years I have left in this cycle, this new path is far and away the most important. And delight of delights, my son wishes to learn these things as well so I have had practice in orally teaching concepts. And he understands them well; he is within that age range that I do suspect the Druids of old liked to take students from. Taliesin, an appropriate and powerful name indeed. A pity his older brother, Tristan, doesn't have the same desire.

And so by midweek possibly, or weeks end I will petition for the 2nd Degree exams. Let the Gods decide what happens after that. If I am meant to move upward within the Order, I will pass these. If not, then I won't. I'm still an independent Druid regardless of what I do in my Orders. And I suspect Oakmouse is correct; Themselves make priests or priestesses as They wish, no matter our own ideas on the matter.

Cyfnos Gwynt
Druid, Ovate, and Bard

So it begins

My proposed project to write a gwers for the Ovate grade in the OBOD using the cywydd style of poetic verse and setting it to music has been approved by my tutor. Complex? Definitely. Worthwhile? Without doubt. I am up to the task.

So begins my walk down the path. The best way for me to learn anything is by immersing myself in it and so I have begun to write verse even as I study the structure and tinker with composition even as I learn it. Doing things in this way ensures retention of what I learn, seriously imprinting it in my memory.

Using a language not native to the style of verse and aiming to maintain the accent and syllable count while keeping the couplet style is a major challenge, no doubt, but it is also fun to tinker with and certainly causes me to go back to dealing with words in my own language in a way I haven't done in decades. Huzzah!

Cyfnos Gwynt

Musing

Hmmm. I've seen some opinions lately that consider the Buddhist concept of spirit and oneness to be very popular. The gist is that we aren't so much individuals as eddies in the swirl of cosmic awareness, residing in shells or something for a time before dissolving back into the cosmic all. An interesting concept. However, not one I agree with. At least at this point.

I've never been drawn to the Buddhist ideas myself, but I know they work for many people and that's real shiny. To be honest, few of the Eastern practices have ever really appealed to me in any way. I'm not of eastern origin and I suppose the same argument that First Nation folk use concerning the adoption of their beliefs could be applied by eastern folk in the same way. Experience your own before taking someone else's. Funny how people seem to respect that with First Nation things but not with eastern types. That being said, I don't believe the argument is valid in any respect. If it works for someone, then it works and is right for that person, regardless of origin or nationality.

History is replete with peoples being conquered, absorbed, erased, and so on, and generally their faiths are handled in much the same way by the victors. It is natural to adopt that which works. Which is why I regard spirituality as a vehicle of sorts; a framework to build our method for bringing ourselves into harmony with the multiverse. Each of us needs a slightly different, sometimes wildly different, 'vehicle' in which to make the journey we feel drawn to. But they are rarely identical between two people. Which makes spirituality unique to each person. And in a way says that each person is unique in and of themselves since their perceptions of what they need vary.

I do believe that each person is unique and individual. The spirit is eternal, as the Celts said, and I happen to believe this as well. It is also uniquely individual to my mind. Certes when I went to the Summerlands I was a complete individual as was Herself and Himself who were there. I remember many previous lifetimes; I am an old spirit. If we dissolve into the cosmic all at death and are then a different eddy when we return, we ought not be the same spirit, possibly couldn't be. Another form of uniqueness, only it doesn't readily explain the memories of past existence *as myself*, not to me anyway. Something in me, deep down, rejects the eddy of the cosmic all concept.

But that's me and others are different. I believe that whatever belief system a person has is what happens to them when they pass on; if you are Christian and believe in Heaven as noted then that is likely where you will go, unless you believe you'll go to Hell..in which case... If like me you believe in the Otherworld or Summerlands where you go to rest and ponder before returning for another series of lessons in the world, then there you go; to the Summerlands. If you believe you dissolve into the Cosmic All, then that is what happens for *you*. I sometimes get the uncomfortable feeling that the Cosmic All concept behaves in some ways like the monotheisms; this is The Truth. I don't believe there is One Truth, but many.

I suspect we all have a desire to be complete, that is, from a spirit aspect, fully developed and having reached our full potential. That desire, or need, is what drives us to seek a spirituality that fits; a vehicle that will hold the framework of our beliefs and practices and enable us to move ahead in our seeking. For me this is polytheism with animism and Druidry as a the structuring agent; living my life as harmoniously as possible with the world, spirits, and Gods around me. I have been here before and I will be here again. I have had the experience, however brief, of being one with all of Creation, but *without* losing my individuality in the joining.

So spirituality is the vehicle that allows us to strive for that sense of completion, of wholeness, that we tend to seek. That's how I see it anyway.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Of harps and hammers

I spent more than three hours practicing with my harps yesterday. I was astounded by a few things as I went about it, in part how fast I managed to pick up new pieces, especially some of those by O'Carrolan. Never used to learn them that fast. And I've begun to be able to 'read' the music I'm looking at. Since I don't have to look at the strings to set my fingers, it means I can sort of follow along with my eyes on the music as I play. I've never been able to do that before. Amazing.

An incident occurred yestereve which triggered my temper a bit, not the choice made during the incident, but the way in which things were done, which was entirely too callous and sloppy. What is notable about it though isn't the incident itself, it is what happened with me in response to it. As disgusted as I was with the conduct, verse came to me without having to think on it, along with music, and it was not praise verse either, but rather the sort one of the Old Bards may have used to truly punish an errant Chieftain or King. I did not write it down, but I do remember it completely. I'm amazed by the intensity and the exceptionally biting nature of it.

I'm taking this as a note to be cautious of my temper as walking the path I am on it could be horrid if said temper caused such verse to be used on someone without good warrant. I couldn't have done this voluntarily, or so I thought, so I cannot say where this sudden receptivity to such verse comes from; the Awen coming on only to have it provide satire rather than praise is all I can think of. Either way it is a form of inspiration, just in the former case dark inspiration.

I'm more than a little daunted by it. That's power of a sort I have never sought and really would rather not ever use, thanks. No wonder ancient Kings walked carefully around Bards. I would too! At least I really understand what they meant by 'satire', which is nothing like what we mean by it today. O-o

Aside from that though, my playing is ramping up quickly enough and I'm quite happy. As soon as I have the cases for the two smaller harps I'll start carting one around with me wherever I go.

I've been pondering the forge too, which is not surprising given where I've been going of late. There are several projects that have come to mind as I've been traveling and I think I'll imbue them with some energy; singing or chanting as one forms the metal infuses it with power, the same can be done as the piece rests in the fire in a malleable state by playing an instrument. This is especially true of swords which need to be annealed and normalized as well as hardened and tempered. So I think when I making certain things I'll do this; discover their names and infuse them with energy of various sort. Small things of course, I am only a journeywoman smith at this point after all. And not yet accomplished enough a Bard to handle complex or delicate aspects.

Perhaps I'll do what a friend and myself thought of so long ago, before he parted from this material realm; create an inn of sorts, a blend of fantasy and historic to a degree, and maybe call it the Harp 'n Hammer. Jeni brews meads and ales and you know, if things get truly harsh that's a solid trade item that is. *chuckles* Herself allowed that a Master Brewer would be the sort she'd like to apprentice to.

Fun things to think on, but no one sees the future with absolute clarity.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Smiths and flowers

I was sitting in my grove with my harp, a not uncommon activity for me. As usual I was wearing a white bog dress checked with green, blue, and yellow, simple bag shoes, and a pretty blue-green cloak with shoulders covered in bright feathers. I don't own a robe like this one, though I will make one, but I always seem to be wearing it when I meditate. I had my sickle at my hip and my coolie style hat on.

Listening to the wind whispering through the branches and needles of the pines around the grove I picked out a sequence and struck it and...I was elsewhere.

I was in a huge courtyard, a single gateway in the southern wall. All around the interior were simple open front structures much like a lean to, but interconnected. They were smithies. All of them. The smell of charcoal was everywhere. The sky was a brilliant blue, just traces of clouds. The ground was hard packed clay or so it looked. There was plenty of activity of course. No one paid me the slightest attention so I figured I'd have a look around. Ducking into one of the structures I made my way to the forge and watched as several people worked.

They were very handsome people, with features I cannot place only to say they resembled no people I have seen in my travels. A blend of all sorts, if you would. They were chanting and singing with musical accompaniment as they worked the hot metal. There was a great mixture of sound.

The smith who was directing this work looked at me and told me to listen if I had ears, to see if I had eyes, and to pay close attention, and remember.

After a bit I noted that under the apparent chaotic cacophony there was rhythm; a lovely one as well. Once discerned it became easier to trace. Without thinking about it executed a portion on the harp and I was...elsewhere...

In what could have been an orchard but I knew was not, with grasses of various sorts all around and trees that looked like apple trees but unlike any I had ever seen. They were covered with blossoms of various colors and gave off some of the most delightful smells. Every time a breeze blew the blossoms rang like tiny bells of different tunes; it was very beautiful, and they did not play randomly as I noted after a time. I was tempted to imitate it and see where I'd go, but it is not wise to simply galavant around at random without thought or respect. I had done enough.

I sounded the tune that brought me to my Grove and pondered what I'd seen. I'm still new to this sort of travel and so had much to think on. I still do.

Fascinating.

Cyfnos Gwynt

A Harper

That is what I am, or what I am to be at any rate. I am not particularly accomplished at this moment in time, but I will be and rather soon too.

This is the path I was meant to walk, and I believe only now could I begin to walk it. All of the experiences of my life, from being a class A prick and asshole right through death and rebirth to continue on, it has all been for this. A preparation.

Harpers today are generally thought of as one of two things; a fantasy game character, or some magazine people. Harpist is more commonly what the player of a harp is called, but a harpist is, in fact, more of a formal type player as it were. Harpers are wanderers, storytellers and songweavers, Bards of the Folk. Not as refined as our colleagues in many ways, but just as skilled in our own.

I am a Harper. I travel by the sounds of my harp. There are some wondrous places out there and oh so much to learn! I do not overestimate my knowledge and wisdom, but in the few places I have been so far I feel again like a child confronted with the mysterious world. What a grand feeling!

My Grandfather, who was Welsh and played in the Eisteddfod in his younger days, once told me that a Harper ideally makes their own harp, so that the Harper's spirit and essence is infused with and entwined with the spirit of the instrument itself. So, he told me, was it for the Great Harpers of old. Interestingly, my totem the Great Bear told me the same recently.

So I have one planned out to build myself, entirely by hand although the metal bits will be purchased. She is designed to take bronze strings, but will also handle nylon. She is of clarsach type and has no name as yet; she is not yet made and cannot tell me! 30 strings she will have, enough for her purpose and a bit more. She will become an heirloom of sorts.

I have gone places. I arrived in a courtyard surrounded by open structures like lean-tos. Very large with a gate in the South. Only smiths lived there, and what smiths! I have never seen people like them, so familiar yet so strange. Handsome to a fault! And so skilled! And I watched, listened, and learned. They sang and chanted to the pieces as they forged them, and told me to see if I had eyes to do so, and to listen. There was much to learn there, and much still to unpack in meditation.

In another place were trees with beautiful bell-shaped blossoms..which chimed like bells in the breeze. A moment's listening and patterns unfolded themselves...

I have gone places. Not many yet, but over the next few lifetimes I will. This is what I was always meant to do. Always a student, never truly a master. :) I love the learning.

Now the task is to start bringing some of this, however imperfectly, to other folk via my harps and story. It is no small task.

Out of nowhere my son, Taliesin, asks to be taught the harp. A shiver ran up my spine at the earnestness in his eyes. He's long since asked to be taught to forge and I had planned such anyway. So I will also teach him some woodworking skills...just in case. He is named after one of the greatest of Bards.

There is power in music; great power. The power of Creation itself, if one knows the secrets. They say the old Bards did. I can travel as they did. I do not crave the power of Creation. It awes me and humbles me. Nor do I know the secrets of it, neither will I search for them. It is enough to travel, to learn, and to pass on. Perhaps some day the Bards will rediscover or remember that power. I think it easy to see why the greatest of Bards commanded it and not just anyone; it is far too easy to abuse, and in abuse, far too devastating to play with at a whim.

I will happily settle for that unity with all things that it brings, that oneness with all of Creation that comes through it. It is a gift beyond price and is more than I could have asked for.

Listen for the music in nature about you, not just to the music we make. It has much to tell you, if you can but hear it.

Cyfnos Gwynt (a good name for a Harper)

Musings

I've decided to leave the whole 'holy' business to those for whom it is a useful descriptor and otherwise pay it no mind. I'm not fool enough to think it'll go away, or that it has no power to stir up difficulty if it is used in the wrong company, but there's nothing much I can do about it so I'll simply leave it. I don't make any claims to be anything other than what I am; a rather ordinary individual. What other people do or think is for them to deal with.

I've been re-reading 'The Druid Way' by Philip Carr-Gom, Chief Druid of the OBOD. Himself walks the Old Ways of his area in Britain essentially, gaining some fascinating insights and knowledge. Fascinating book I must say, even the second time around.

It occurred to me that some of the ancient pathways used by both the Native Americans and the later colonists are still here too, and many of them still accessible without having to deal with massive traffic. It is an unfortunate fact that many of the old trackways were paved over, but some of them still exist. Not many, to be sure as much is on private land one cannot traverse, and certainly not walkable in the same sense as the Chief Druid did, but I think it would still be useful.

I have walked Battle Road, made sacred by the opening exchanges of battle in our War of Independence. I have walked sections of the Mohawk Trail that aren't paved over, some of the trails through the Pocumtucks and through the Holyoke Range. Mostly with my eyes tight shut unfortunately, so it is time to do them yet again with eyes wide open. In keeping with domesticating my Druidry, I believe it will help me get closer to the spirits and Gods of this land itself, in addition to those of my Ancestors.

To be honest, I don't need an excuse to be out among the trees and various folk; I love it for its own sake. One of the best benefits of walking has been that stellar aspect of pausing to talk to people you don't know, about their flowers, the weather, crops, what have you. We've lost much of that in our car culture. When I began walking all the time again I rediscovered this, after people got used to seeing me about and lost their suspicion. That latter is a sad result of our insular lives; out of touch with the world, with ourselves, with one another. Tribes can't survive that way.

So now I walk along and get greeted constantly, sometimes a person in their car will pull over to have a brief chat, sometimes it's just a pause by a driveway or fence and a few pleasantries exchanged. Occasionally providing a sympathetic ear to troubles; strangers are sometimes easier to talk to than those close to us.

I plan to do the same with the land itself. I'm close to the spirits around me here, but it is time to extend that, follow the streams to their sources, find the glades on the tops of hills, the hollows at their bases, the sun drenched pools of quiet that still lie about. Then get to know the spirits there and listen to what they have to teach.

As I have been wandering the lands around here I have been struck, upon reflection, with how it has changed *me*. Life has slowed for me, things that once seemed important are shown to be hollow things without a lot of substance at times. Things I overlooked in my racing about I began to see and marvel at. And the Land educates. All one must do is listen.

Cyfnos Gwynt

Personal touches

I've been thinking on rituals of late, yes still, and personal touches to said rituals has been on my mind a fair amount.

The AODA Grove has one entering from a direction appropriate to one's standing in the Order; that is, Candidates, Apprentices, Companions and Adepts enter different sides of the circle based on their status.

The OBOD has people enter from the West and that has been standard thus far, although where one sits within the circle varies.

I have most commonly entered the Grove from the West, even before I found the OBOD. This past Alban Heruin I entered from the South as was appropriate seeing I was using the AODA's basic opening. I still prefer the West. At any Order gathering I would enter via the appropriate direction as dictated by whatever Order I was participating with.

Interestingly, my basic affinity and preference is for the North though I've yet to find any group that enters from this direction. I figure it is pretty obvious as to why. Nevertheless, the North is my favorite direction and the Great Bear my totem and teacher, and that symbol is also a northern one. I prefer to sit in the North when in the Grove, though I don't do this at established Groves for the Orders I belong to. Respect is deserved and given to the structure these Orders prescribe. But for myself and my own Grove, both real and in the Astral, my seat is in the North and the altar is placed between the fire ring and moon pool in the center and the seat in the North.

I can almost hear certain people from certain quarters howling in outrage. That doesn't change a thing. Since before I discovered Druid organizations the North has called to me, has been the direction I most look to. I am from the northern regions of my country, and the northern regions of my state. My totem is the Great Bear, as I have said, and the twilight of the Time Between Time twice each day is my time, and the magical winds that come from the North like fresh air. It is odd, I think, being as I am a Cancer by birth, Virgo by the Moon, and Leo by the Sun. So why would the direction of Earth call to me so? I suspect because of my deep and rather ancient ties with Herself, Mother Earth.

Do not take me wrong! I have other guides, amongst them the Hawk from the East, the Stag of the South, and the Dolphin of the West (yes, I said Dolphin and not Salmon, what can I say?). The Great Dragons have been my guides and teachers all of my life and are the totems of my Clan. But the Great Bear of the North is my personal totem.

I feel that the magic that I work, the meditation and thought that I do, and the union with all things is deeper, more efficient and more effective when done with what calls one on a personal level. So I do not call my northern preference wrong or cheeky, but right for me and so I will continue with it, as I have done for more than 30 years. So long as I offer proper observance and respect to the Orders I belong to when I am practicing with them or within their Groves, all is well. I know the Northern Seat is traditionally that of the Archdruid, or in our case, the Grand Archdruid, and I do not claim any such standing, but the North is for me in my own practice and so it shall remain. A child of the North I am and will remain.

One of the AODA's greatest strengths is its diversity on the personal level. What an awesome Order. The first cowydd I create will be about AODA and revivalism in general, but after that expect some with a northern flavor fairly often. To be sure, many will have to do with various people I know, and of course the troubling issues of our current time, but there is much room for praise of other things too.

Cyfnos Gwynt